Time to myself. . .

I almost forgot what that felt like, time to myself! My husband took the kiddos to the pool for "night swim" tonight and I opted to stay home since I am having some pain from my cyst. Why is it when I actually get time to myself, I spend the majority of it trying to figure out WHAT I should do with it?

I started trying to figure out how to make a DVD copy from our video camera. . .could not figure that out so I watched a bit of Project Runway, because the tv was already on. Then I decided I better take a shower. . .since I have been trying to do that all day! I went to Curves this morning with my daughter and came home and got busy doing chores that have piled up while I was feeling bad. Then I worked a bit on the PTA newsletter. . .and a LOT on looking at other peoples blogs. I like the next blog button, I am hooked!

Besides the fact that I stink from going to the gym, I also wanted to look presentable to my husband when he came home. I think it is important to at least try to look good for him when he comes in after a long day in the trenches. (Of course there is only so much I can do with this fat sloppy body. . .but I try). My motivation for going Curves, besides being able to play softball again with out dropping dead, is to be sexy for my husband again. I dont have a specific weight I want to get to. . .just not enough to be 2 people, which is where I am now. It is a great thing that I am tall! I have everyone fooled, oh, not that I am fat. . .that is obvious! But everytime I go to the doctors office and there is a new nurse or something (one that does not look at my previous weight. . .DUH!) they start out at 150! Yeah RIGHT! I wish! So I keep pointing toward the right to indicate, nope it is more so they move it to 200. . .this goes on way too long for my taste! And the nurse is always surprised at how fat I actually am.

Now dont get me wrong. . . I am NOT saying you cant be fat and sexy. . .but it is harder considering the clothes that they make for fat people are BUTT UGLY ( most of the time) or way way over priced! And forget finding sexy lingere! It practically does not exsist! It is harder to find then big womans maternity clothes. Because apparently we are too fat to have sex or babies! This is something that really ticks me off! Big woman want to look good too!