This past week, right after my hysterectomy, my son on his way down the stairs in our front foyer to catch the bus, tripped down the stairs. He injured his big toe. My husband and I (who both heard him fall) came to ask him if he was okay. Although he seemed a little irritated and embarrassed (been there, done that. . .last time at my dd's middle school right in the middle of the hallway! OUCH!) he said he was fine. So off he went to catch the bus, then the younger 3 followed suit. My husband who had been home already for 1 full week taking care of me and the kids after my major surgery and 2 day stay at the hospital as well as manadory bed rest at home HAD to go into work that day. So after getting kids off to school and doing some things around the house (I cant even load the dishwasher!) he tried to log on and work from home. He soon discovered that he had to actually go into the office and "put out some fires". So in the early afternoon he went to work. When Z came home I asked him how his foot was and he said it was fine. A little while later he told me it hurt and when I looked at it I saw that it was bruised and figured he needed to get an xray. Not that it really matters with toes, because they cant do anything but confirm a fracture. They dont cast toes, they just wrap them. I could have done that at home. But I am always very cautious with my kids and their health, I would much rather take them to the doctor and have THEM tell me oh they are fine, no need to worry, you did not have to bring them in then to not bring them in and miss something major. So I called my husband and left a message telling him that he had to take Z to the doctor when he got home. Z did not feel like he needed to go, he said it was fine.
So jump forward a bit to around 10 pm, when my husband arrived home and agreed that he needed to go to the doctor. We briefly discussed whether or not we should take him into the urgent care clinic or the reg doctor the following day. It was decided that the urgent care clinic was the best thing to do, that way he would not miss any school. So my husband took Z to the urgent care clinic. After the urgent care clinic Z came home with a soft-sided “boot” to wear for his slightly broken big toe. The next morning not long after he left for school the urgent care clinic called back and said that the radiologist who checks the x-rays said his toe was in fact NOT broken at all.
That afternoon, about 5 minutes after my younger 3 kids got home from elementary school, I saw a woman coming to the door. Must be a sales person I thought. So I went to the door to get rid of her quickly (or so I thought!) by telling her I had just had surgery. She had an id badge hanging around her neck and a stack of papers and folders in her hands, but honestly I did not pay attention to her id badge, cause seems like everyone has one these days. She began by asking for my husband. I told her that he was not home but I was his wife. She then asked me if I was Z’s motheProbablybly not a salesperson I thought, but I still did not know who she was. After I told her I was Z’s mother she said “We have gotten a report that your son broke his leg and you did not seek medical attention for it.”
I responded by saying, “First of all he told that he broke is big toe last night and they already called this morning to say it was in fact NOT broken. And second of all, WHO THE HELL ARE YOU!!” Only then did she “identify” herself as being from social services. A lot of the rest of the conversation is really a blur. To tell you the truth I was so shocked and totally annoyed that I can’t remember exactly what was said. I remember telling her that I had just had major surgery a WEEK ago and could not drive that is why my husband took our son in late in the evening. She also repeatedly asked me if she could come into my home and “look around”. Each time I told her, “Not without a search warrant you can’t”. She kept pushing that issue, like I was an idiot who did not know my rights. My other kids were on the steps behind me and she looked passed me and asked if those “were all my kids”. I told her, yes in fact they were all my children. I had 5 children and they were all my natural children and they were all healthy and fine.
Then she asked me if Zwas home. I told her no, that his bus did not get home for another 15 minutes and it came later then the other kids bus. She seemed to want to wait for him and I told her she was welcome to wait and see if he was indeed okay. I asked her for something in writing and she gave me a generic form with her name and todayÂ’s date. Then she got into her car and after a few minutes left. I waited in my foyer for ZÂ’s bus to insure that she did not try to talk to him alone or anything. Then I called my husband , who called our lawyer. Z arrived home around 4:10 and she was no where in sight and did not come back that evening.
Then I began running around and cleaning. . .doing all the things the doctor had forbidden me to do! Bending to pick things up, loading and unloading the dishwasher, washing dishes, doing laundry. . .all the things I had left for my husband and kids to do. I was beginning to hurt. Then one of my friends called back and said she had gotten at least one other lady from the church for sure and they would be there in an hour to help me crisis clean the house, in case they came back. I nearly burst into tears! Okay, I did. . .not that it was hard cause I had been doing that on and off since I closed the door on the social worker. I had not idea if or when she would show back up and if she would be alone or with a police officer and a search warrant! Talk about stressed out!
The next day I jumped everytime I heard a car pass and was looking out the window the whole day! I jumped out of my skin when a neighbor sent her son down to borrow some butter! Around 1:50, the phone rang and it was the social worker from the day before. She was cpositionto see if my positon from the previous day had “changed”. When I asked her what position, she said the one where I refused to allow her to come into my home. I assured her that no, my position had not changed. (I mean was there a constitutional amendment I did not know about in the past 12 hours!?!?!?) She then went on to insist that she needed the names and birthdates of each of my other children and that she wanted to interview each of them as well. Of course I told her no way was she going to be getting that information or doing that! I cited the fact that the “complaint” was against my husband and one son, Z, not the rest of the nonsensee spouted some nonesence about having the “right” to talk to all the children as well as to come into my home if she wanted to. I told her that I would double check with my lawyer and if he felt like she had a legal “right” to that information then I would give it to her at the meeting that afternoon. She was not happy at all. The last question she asked me was what school my son attended. I refused to give her that information as well. As I suspected when I spoke to my lawyer after that phone conversation he agreed that the information they requested was not needed by them and should not be given to them at all.
I had previously arranged for a friend to video tape the meeting scheduled for that afternoon. About 5 minutes before my friend arrived, the phone rang. This time it was the social workers supervisor. She was unclear about some things that had transpired at the first meeting and wanted to “clear some things up”. I told her I was more then happy to do just that. Then she proceeded to tell me that they did have the right to enter my home if they wanted to. I again reminded them that they were more then welcome to if they had a search warrant. She told me that she did not need a search warrant, she could come into my home whenever she felt it was needed. To which I responded, then why have you not been in there yet? Then I handed the phone to my husband. She continued to argue that they had the right to come into our home. She even went so far as to quote Senate Bill 757 saying it gave her that right. (We looked up that Senate bill later that evening and it is about deer hunting!). The conversation ended and we waited for the social worker to arrive. Meanwhile my younger kids arrived home from school and I sent them up to my friends house right away, as my lawyer had told me to do. My videographer and friend arrived and we all prayed together.
Then the woman arrived and we met her in the driveway of our home. When I asked her for her ID, she had to go to her car to get it. She began by asking my husband some questions. My son was next. Then she again asked to come into our home and to see the other kids. That is when we gave her our lawyers name and number. Before she left she filled out a form that stated that Z was indeed in a safe environment and my husband signed it. She tried to get us to sign a HIPA form, but we refused. She left after telling us that they would contact us to set up a time to meet with the other kids. We doubt that the lawyer will let that happen. There is no legal reason for it to happen.
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