The saga of the New Mattress. . .

Well, we finally did it! We went out and purchased a new king size mattress today. We might finally get rid of our old new one! Let me explain. A year and a half ago my husband and I were out shopping around for a new mattress so we were trying them out etc so that we would know what we wanted WHEN we could afford it. . .So, I being the loving wonderful wife that I am decided to surprise my husband with the mattress that he liked for his birthday. No problem, right? Yes, the furniture store credit card rate is way too high. . .but he is worth it!

I guess I should also tell you that the bed we were getting rid of because he hated it, was the famous "Sleep Number" bed. Only we got it before it was digital, so it just has a rocker control for more or less air. This bed was a gift from my MIL, and to save money she bought 2 extra long twins for us to put side by side. . .I think it might have been her way of trying to get us to stop having sex and making babies. . .but I digress. . .Anyway, we used the sleep number bed for awhile, but he hated it because he felt like he was on a bubble all the time. he liked to have his pumped up all the way, while I prefered to have mine like a hammock with almost no air it it. . .LOL. Lets just say it made any bedroom recreation "interesting"! So the girls got the sleep number beds and I bought the really expensive top of the line bed that I thought was the one my husband liked!

They delivered the bed and when they put it in I swear to you it was almost too high for our bed frame! There was no way he was gonna miss that! I thought it would be fun to see how long it would take him to "notice" the new bed. No question of that now, my youngest son was barely visible when he stood next to the bed! Well, apparently it was not the bed he wanted and he HATED this one too. So the next morning we called the place right when they opened to tell them we hated the bed. Too bad they said, you slept on it. I was like, we have had it for less then 10 hours and we paid $1400 for it! Too bad still they said. OUCH!!!!

So we tried it for a few more days then we made a nice empty spot for it in the garage so we could use our Sleep number bed again. A few attempt sell the bed on eBay failed miserably as did 2 garage sales attempts. Can you say LOCAL PICK UP ONLY? I lost count of how many times I emailed IDIOTS on eBay telling them NO I would NOT ship this HUGE freaking bed cross country! DUH!!! I even had one bright user who Bought it Now about 4 hours before the auction was to end, and I had several people bidding. She emailed me the next day. I accidentally pressed Buy it Now she said, I am sorry I did not mean to. Thanks lady, my bidders are LONG GONE, eBay has already collected their fees based on a $1200 sale!, and you accidentally clicked something! More like you did it on purpose and then told your husband who said no or something. She even tried to blame it on her kids! Good grief! Anyone who has used eBay knows you cant accidentally Buy it Now! You have to like triple confirm it etc. ARGH!!!

Then the bed came back to our room only this time the memory foam topper was placed down, next to the box springs so that the unfinished bottom was now what we slept against. Good thing we had a foam egg crate type topper! Oh yeah and since this thing was so high. . .18 inches to be exact, I had to buy special sheets to fit it. . .they cost $60!

Oh the pure JOY of cringing everytime I heard my husband complain about "the bed". I would just think, I am such an idiot, I will NEVER surprise him ever ever ever again! Each comment was a reminder of how stupid of me it was to buy the bed and try to surprise him. There were so many times I wanted to take up smoking (which I HATE) just to "fall asleep" on the bed. . .

This afternoon we borrowed our neighbors van because the church is using ours for the youth mission trip which is okay considering our oldest dd is there too. So we figured we would just slip the king size mattress on top of the seats and drive home. We called several places in between looking at several places and Big Lots had 3 promising ones and all 3 area Big Lots that I called told me their return policy on mattresses was 30 days with receipt! Great! No lemons this time! So we drive way out to Kansas from Missouri (okay it was like 20 miles. . .) in the swealtering heat ( it was over 100 today!). We look at the mattresses and showthe guy the one we want to buy. He was like okay, lets ring it up! I mentioned something about the 30 day return policy and he says, "What! Not on mattresses! No returns!" Of course I am ticked now, cause 20 minutes ago someone from THIS STORE ( as well as 2 others) told me there was a 3o day return policy. He tries to argue with me then he says let me get the manager. I had to walk away I was so mad! My husband dealt with it and he told the manager that he needed to get his policies straight and not mislead costomers like that. He ended up giving us the 30 day policy even though apparantly they have NEVER had one at all. hmmm?! So we told him, look if you want us to keep it in the plastic we will. Great he says! So off to the full size van to slip the mattress in. . .

Yeah, about that! Well apparently that thing did not want to be slipped in! We had to bend, push, pull, poke, prod, squeeze, man handle, and SHOVE the stupid thing in there! AND we had to unhook the seats and move them forward some! After getting the back doors closed ( amazingly! ). We went home and moved the old expensive surprise upside down reminder of what an idiot you are bed back to the garage so we could put the new 30 day return with reciept just for us please be comfortable so we can forget "THE BED" mattress in place! As we tried to extricate said new mattress from the van on of the handles ripped off! (good thing it has a 30 day return policy AND a 10 year warranty!) ARGH!!!! We finally managed to get the thing out of the van and get it up the stairs and on the bed with our killing anyone! WHOOT!

So, now as I write this the naked new bed is staring at me waiting to have fresh sheets put on it. Lets just hope this thing is comfortable, cause I am DONE buying new mattresses for the rest of my lifetime! I will be sure to let you know if 1) more idiots want me to ship the old mattress to Alaska 2) we actually make any money from it at ALL 3) We decide to burn it or Freecycle it. . .anyone want to roast some marshmallows????